Capri: Italian for "Paradise"

TOP: Re-Lumpying in Capri

2nd: A grotto pool, with Capri map

3rd: Lunch on the island (NOTE wine bottle)

4th: View westward from town

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After the hellish night in Naples, most anything would have been a step up. Then, there was Capri. Capri was an island paradise, incredible vista's of the Meditteranean from 1,500 feet up on "the rock", fantastic native food, excellent native wine (@ $5/bottle), and great shopping. Luckily for me, our bags were full, so the shopping was limited.

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We spent 3 days on Capri, and would have done far more had not Rome called to us. My favorite story from Capri was that we were sitting having lunch at a local bistro. After finishing our first bottle of local wine, I wanted to order another. Ms. "let's keep you out of AA" my lovely wife "suggested" that we didn't need another. At that point the fellow at the table next to us leans over, pours me a glass from his bottle, and says "you can never have enough wine". So, I just HAD to drink it...along with the 4 ADDITIONAL BOTTLES that he ordered.

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As we're drinking for another hour or so, we're talking with the next table about traveller stuff. They were a group of 6 all related who were on their way to see the Giants-Dolphins game in London...via Capri! They felt they needed some wine first, I guess.

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Anyhow, the one gal says that they're from Texas (so, obviously Giants fans..you figure it out). So Kathy says "Oh, it must be so embarrasing to have Bush from your state". The woman replies "Oh, George is my first cousin". Kathy gets that look on her face and says "Oh, I'm sorry". The woman says "Don't worry about it". Kathy replies, "No, I'm sorry that you're related to him, THAT's got to be embarrasing"!

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Her husband holds up his glass, toasts to the line, and we spend at least another hour drinking his wine...what fun!

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Tomorrow, off to Roma!

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Isla Lumpy out

Naples: Italian for "shithole"

LEFT: Naples harbor from the ferry outbound to Capri

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The best part of Naples is leaving it. The city is dirty, the drivers are insance, the people are rude, and the food sucked. That pretty much sums it up; Camden, without the ambience.

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One Naples story however. Upon arrival back from Capri (next post), we grab a taxi from the marine harbor to the train station, because we cannot stomach another walk through Naples streets. We get in the cab, and he proceeds to blast about 60mph through the city streets (remember, I've been in NYC, Boston...not even close to this experience). At one point he is driving on the tram tracks, with a tram approaching us. Then, the rear hatch of the taxi pops open. Kathy and I reach out back to grab our luggage as it is falling out the door. As we do, a Naples motorcycle rider comes from nowhere pulling up to the open hatch, and tries to grab our luggage out. As we're fighting with him, the taxi driver slams on this brakes, the hatch slams shut, we go flying, and the motorcycle guy slams into the back of the taxi. But, at least we still have our luggage!

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We continue on towards the train station. The driver cuts down a one-way alley (the wrong way of course, but who's counting), and drives up on the sidewalk when another car comes at us. This leads to his driver's side mirror beings torn right off the taxi by the approaching car. The taxi driver just cusses out the other driver and keeps on going.

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We finally get to the train station, leap out of the car, and bolt to our train. "Mario Andretti's" tip should cover the cost of his new mirror.

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Florence in Pictures

Now I'm pretty much anything but an art afictionado, but even I had to take pause at the volume and level of artwork available in Florence; churches, palaces and squares adorned with glasswork, paintings, statues, and such. The city was just incredible, and I suspect that if you went there for a year, you'd still be discovering new things every day. The pictures just don't do it justice....go check it out for yourself.

Smart Guys Dead in Florence

TOP: Michaelangelo crypt

2nd/3rd: Machiavelli crypt and statue

4th/5th: Galileo crypt and statue

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One church in Florence had the crypt of Michaelangelo, Galileo, Machiavelli, Dante, Marconi (radio), Fermi (physicist) and a host of others. The irony in it all was that the catholic church probably fought most of their teaching, as they did with Galileo. He was put under house arrest (and died there, broke and blind) during the Inquisition, for teaching that the earth was not the center of the universe. Those popes, they knew their science.

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Luckily for him, the catholic pope in 1992 (almost 400 years later) expressed regret for how the incident was handled...not that agreed with Galileo's conclusions or anything like that.

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Lumpy, the Science guy out

Give Me Beef!!!!!

As we were now 4-5 weeks into our trip, we were turning protein deficient. There was no meat in Africa, and the meat in the Central EEU was pretty bad for the most part. So, when we came upon the "Il Latina" restaurant in Firenze, we were totally wired.
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US friends had told us to check this restaurant out, so we did. Upon arrival, we got in queue for when the doors opened. By the time they opened, there were probably 200-300 people in queue...all meat deprived also, and salivating. We started talking to the people in front of us in line, and, surprise, they had gotten married and lived in Rochester for a number of years. Then, the two girls behind us chime in, and one of them had gone to school in Rochester and lived there for a few years. How bizarre is that...4,000 miles away, waiting in a restaurant line, and the 3 groups in a row from Rochester.
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Anyhow, we get in the restaurant, sit down at the community tables, and meet our dining mates. One one side are two longtime lady friends, one from NYC and one from Seattle. On the other is a Swedish former stewardess (70ish, looking about 30) and her granddaughter. We make friends and begin to eat.
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Now eating in Italy is an experience itself, and eating at Il Latina is an adventure. Our model-like Italian waiter just starts bringing us food....endless, humongous portions of food. Antipasto...cheeses...soups...risotto...the food just keeps on coming.
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We're 2 minutes into the meal and already the gal from NYC is telling me to "F off", and the gal from Sweden is telling me how nice it is that I'm not like that NYC gal. The meal spins out of control, as I attempt to get the waiter to ask out the NYC gal, who is longing for some "sweet italian meat" (as I referred to him).
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Finally, the highlight of the evening...they bring the meat platter. We get chicken, beef, lamb, veal, and probably 10 other meats that I have no idea what they were. I'd say roughly 15lbs of meat for the 6 of us. I proceed to move into meat-overdrive, and after NEARLY 2 HOURS of meat only eating, finish the entire plate. The Swedish stewardess looks at me, slowly stands up, and begins to applaud. She say that was the most incredible eating display that she has ever seen in her life. I feel honored and humbled.
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3-4 hours after we start, we finally finish our meals, and roll out the door in a meat-induced stupor. Although it's only about a mile back to our convent lodging, it takes us several hours, as we can barely walk. The meat is just sloshing around inside our intestines.
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If you ever get to Firenze, do Il Latina...you won't be sorry.
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"Meatman" Lumpy out

Statue Time

TOP: Statue of non-nude guy...somebody made a mistake I guess

2nd: Statue of nude guy

3rd:Statue of really famous nude guy

4th: Statue of 2 nude guys...somebody worked overtime on this one

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Firenze was the seat of the Renaissance in Italy, and nobody does the Renaissance like the Medici's! Incredible statues, palaces, and artwork. And one thing those Medici's knew...it was nude guys. Nude guy paintings and statues everywhere. In the palaces, on the streets, in the churches. It's enough to make a catholic priest go into overload!

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We began our Firenze tour by hitting the medici palace. It was an incredible sight to behold, with artwork in every corner of the building, including endless frescoes on the ceilings. It really has to be seen live to be appreciated...pictures just don't do it justice. We then made the "Tour de Churches", hitting numerous "small" ones (equivalent to a cathedral here in the US), and some "big" ones (equivalent to the Pentagon). The main domo was amongst the largest buildings I've ever seen, and easily the largest church by several orders of magnitude. And, outside every church, was old, one-legged, Italian women begging..or sometimes young, pregnant women holding 1 or 2 babies wrapped. Begging is very commonplace in Italy, and was a bit of a shock to our US sensibilities. Here were these incredibly wealthy churches, and yet they let people beg on their doorsteps rather than helping them. WWJD?

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Impressed, but saddened Lumpy out

You say po-ta-to, I say Po-tat-o

LEFT: A Wonderfully ornate bed at the Firenze convent we lodged in.
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After an outstanding stay in Venice (my new favorite city in the whole world!), we went to train down to Florence. We went to the Venice train station, and, low and behold, no Florence. Damn, did Bush bomb Italy too!


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Turns out that the Italians call Florence "Firenze". So, after wandering around the station for a while, we finally figure that out. What the heck is the matter with them, not naming their city in english?


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We train down to Firenze, and upon exiting the train station find out we have about a mile walk to our hotel. So, we start walking, and come upon wonder #1 of Firenze...scooters. Scotters everywhere, all makes and sizes, with no sense of traffic laws whatsoever. They drive on the sidewalks (such as they are), through lights, across squares, and, basically just insane. You take your life in your hands just walking down the sidewalk, to say nothing of trying to cross a street.


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Wonder #2 of Firenze are the sidewalks. They are basically about 1/2 a person wide, filled with people walking, scooters, tables from the bistros, garbage bins, dogs, one-legged old italian women begging, and on and on. You cannot make forward progress on a sidewalk, it's just impossible.


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We finally arrive at our hotel, which, in a bit of sheer irony, was formerly a convent. Kathy has selected it just to bust my round ones. It is however a beautiful place inside, and we get the Mother Superior room...where else would you put me up for the night! If I didn't have a lock on hell before that night, I certainly do now.
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Bound for hell Lumpy out